Saturday, November 12, 2011

No Show

Well, it is Saturday, Nov. 12th. My CD1 is usually the 6th of the month. I still haven't started yet. I think after 2 rounds of IVF, my body doesn't know up from down. Poor's so confused!

And no, I'm not pregnant. I even took a test in case some sort of 2nd coming had occurred. ;-)

On a positive note, I've lost 8 pounds since IVF. I don't feel like I can take much credit for this. That medicine makes me super hungry. Once I get off of it, I don't feel like I could eat a house anymore!

I am due back to the acupuncturist soon. I'm not sure what she'll do to me since I'm so late.

Saturday, November 5, 2011

And We Wait...

On Wed., Nov 2nd, Hubby and I made the trip to my Doc's office to talk about our last IVF cycle and to discuss future plans. Many of my fellow bloggers call this the WTF Appointment and this is actually pretty accurate!

Our Doc greeted us, shook our hands very sadly, and we all sat down in his office. He simply looked down at my charts and shook his head for a minute. He said he was baffled. He had thought IVF #1 was going to work and just knew that this IVF #2 was going to work. I responded well to meds, my bloodwork looked great, we used 2 great looking embryos again this time, and I did everything that I was supposed to do. He said that he was completely shocked it didn't work this time. I'm glad I'm not the only one...

He immediately dove into what could've gone wrong. He said that there is a possibility that there might be something wrong with my lining - that it was thick enough - but perhaps there was something else wrong with it. He said the only way to tell is to do an endometrial biopsy. The problem with that is that you cannot do one on the cycle you're using. So, you'll never be able to tell for sure. He didn't think there are enough signs to warrant this anyways.

I asked if dealing with OHSS would have caused problems with implantation and he didn't think so. I told him that it sucked and further, this whole round sucked, from more meds, a very painful retrieval where I felt everything, and OHSS. He said that he could give me more pain meds and apologized for hurting me.

He went on to say that since we have 3 embryos frozen, we should try a Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET). He said they'd have me take birth control pills for 3 weeks just like the fresh cycles. Then, I'd go on Lupron to shut everything down. He said I'd have to travel to his office once for an ultrasound to make sure everything was quiet and my lining was "pretty" - not the first time he's described it this way. Then I'd take some estrogen and I'd have the transfer. In all, it would be about a 7-week process from CD 1.

He said he'd recommend thawing all 3 embryos to evaluate for use. He'd probably recommend using 2 if all make it through thaw and re-freezing the 3rd. He said if we wanted to use all 3, he wouldn't fight us too hard on it. In my mind,I thought I'd like to use all 3 and then quickly told myself not to worry about it. The last 2 times I have fretted and stewed about how many to use and the answer has been easily handed to us both times. He said it'd be an easier process on my body with no retrieval or OHSS. He said it'd also be much cheaper than a fresh cycle. Given that I'm out of allowable expenditures for drugs for the rest of 2011, that's good news.

He also mentioned that when I start the next IVF cycle that I should take a baby aspirin daily. He said that they used to do this all the time with patients, but stopped because there is no definitive data that says this helps. Hubby asked him about acupuncture and he said that if we can afford it, we should go ahead -it can't hurt and may help.

Then he asked me how I'm sleeping and if I'm experiencing sadness. I told him I'm probably not sleeping enough, but that's just because I'm busy and go to bed too late and get up too early. I told him I'm not overly sad - that it really hits me hardest when I see someone I haven't seen in a long time and they ask if we have any good news about IVF. Other than that, I think I'm ok. He said that's normal and just wanted to make sure I wasn't suffering from any depression symptoms.

On the way out, he had us stop at his Nurse's office where he gave her instructions to make note that we are going to do an FET. My CD 1 should be sometime around Nov 6th (tomorrow, my b-day). Counting 7 weeks from then would get us right in the heart of their Christmas break. So that's a no-go. :-( I could have a giant 2-year-old meltdown about how their vacation should no make me wait another month after we've already waited for so long - but where would that get me? So, I have to call on CD 1 in December and transfer would be in mid-January. This part made me sad. Another birthday, Christmas, and New Year's with no good news about a little one to share with family and friends. But I guess it is what it is, and so we wait...

In all, it was really a visit that I could've scripted before I went, except for the waiting part. I was pleased at my Doc's response - he's as baffled as we are and wants to make sure we're ok. He's getting us to do an FET as quickly as he can. He's a good Doc, for sure.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

On the Table with My Clothes On!

So at 4pm today, I visited my hospital's complementary medicine unit to receive my first treatment of acupuncture.  Now, let me say that I'm still not 100% sold that this is the key to getting knocked up.  However, I am desperate and willing to try it if there's even a slight chance that it helps.  I was nervous that it would hurt, too.

When I arrived, I had to pay the $75 fee, fill out a 4-page form about my health history, and was then led to a room down the hall.  Sara, the acupuncturist, who I know outside of the hospital, came in and began asking me questions.  She made some notes as we talked and reaffirmed that there are certain things that have to be done on certain days during the IVF cycle.  She mentioned that she may be going out of town this month, but has other acupuncturists on "back-up" in case I need something done while she's gone.  Sara reaffirmed that this visit was merely to strengthen my body and lessen PCOS symptoms to prepare me for the next round of IVF.  Hubby asked some questions about how the acupuncture is supposed to help and she went into some info about the kidney being the center of fertility and the liver having something to do with it, so they both are stimulated in Chinese medicine and I have to be honest - my eyes kinda glassed over for a minute.  Hubby said he was with her till she started talking about "chi."  Please give us the benefit of the doubt:  We are willing to try new things, even if we don't understand it all!

She had me slip off my jeans so she was able to get to a spot above my knee.  She ought to know that us infertiles are used to taking off our clothes and getting on a table by now...  I put a sheet over my middle and she began.  I didn't even have to take off my undies for her - just my pants, shoes, and socks!  She wiped a cold fluid on me before putting in each pin.  I'm pretty sure this was alcohol.  She began with one pin in between my eyebrows.  Then she went to my abdomen where she put four more pins: (Towards the right is my head, left is my feet.  This pic is just below my belly button.  If any of you make any comments about my very white belly, we are no longer friends.  Got it?)

Next, she put a pin in each of my hands and then she tagged me down each leg and onto my feet: (Again, no comments about how white and/or dry my legs are or we are no longer friends.  Got it?)

When she was done inserting all 19 pins, she put a heat lamp over my tummy and another over my feet.  She made sure I was comfortable and left the room for about 20 minutes.  The music was soothing and the lights were low.  I was warm from the heat lamps.  I was all calm and then I hear the clicking of Hubby's video game on his phone.  It made me giggle.  It was a relaxing way to spend a few minutes in a busy day.  I will give it that.

After the 20 minutes, she came in and quickly removed the pins.  I noticed a couple smears of blood on my legs where a couple of the pins were.  I honestly didn't feel anything but a slight prick when she inserted them all.  Before leaving, she suggested a website for me to visit if I'd be interested in some dietary suggestions for PCOS and infertility treatments that are meant to be paired with acupuncture.  (I need to check it out.  If it's worth sharing, I will.)

I'm to call her when I have a firm calendar from my Doc.  She said my next appointment will be within a few days of starting the next IVF cycle.  And now we just have to wait to see what the Dr. Larry King says tomorrow.

No Boo This Year

This is my 100th post! I hope everyone had a happy Halloween!

Each year, my church gives out hot dogs and candy for Halloween. We figure giving a little something to eat on the night everyone hurries to get homework done, get on a costume, and make the rounds collecting candy is a good thing to do. We gave out 750 hot dogs last night! I always enjoy seeing all the kids (sometimes parents too) in costume having a good time. Our friends who go to church with us stopped by to help with Halloweenie set up and then left to take their little girl trick-or-treating. That made me a little sad. I wish we had a little one or two to take out on this fun night. I remember Mom helping me get a costume ready for the big venture and having to negotiate with Dad about how many pieces of my candy he was allowed to have when I was little. This is one of those holidays that makes me feel left out now. Perhaps someday we will have a little pumpkin or lion to take trick-or-treating. I'd even dress up, too!

I am anxious about my first acupuncture appointment later today. I hope it doesn't hurt! It cant be as bad as those awful IM shots in the hip...can it? I think Hubby is going with me to see what it's all about. And perhaps a little moral support as well.