Hubby and I are trying to recover from this 2nd failed attempt at IVF-ICSI. Most of the time, I'm ok. Work has been extremely busy lately. Every once in a while, though, I start feeling sorry for myself. Friends at work and church were so disappointed to hear it didn't work. My sister-in-law emailed and said she was sure it was going to work this time. I wish she was right.
I think I've handled it better this time because I found out on my own terms in private. There was not this giant get-your-hopes-up build up. I didn't have to agonize over how many hours I'd have to wait for the beta blood test and then the phone call with results. My period came early. It was an unexpected, unwelcome surprise. But it happened. In my bathroom. In the morning before I really had my wits about me. Several days early. God let me down easy this time.
Hubby hasn't said much, other than he's so very disappointed. Makes me sad that my body is now the one not cooperating. We jumped his IF hurdle. Now why is my bod not doing its job?
Several days after the beta, I realized that my math was a little off. I have been saying that we've now been trying for more than 4 years. That's not actually the truth. Technically, we've really only had a shot at it twice. Out of 4 years of timing, taking temps, charting, and now shooting myself up, we've only had a real shot at a baby two times. Stats show that it takes sometime between 3 months and a year to be successful. I do not like what I just realized.
My body is still recovering from this round of retrieval. My left ovary was handling the brunt of OHSS and I think it's still mad at me. Every once in a while, I feel a tinge of pain. I know you're angry! You don't need to take it out on me!
And now, I need your input! I was speaking with my other sister-in-law about the whole ordeal last weekend. She had several miscarriages and had a lot of trouble conceiving their 4th and final child. She gave me a book that was recommended to her that talks about nutrition and infertility. She and others have suggested both acupuncture and deep tissue massage. Our problems stem from Hubby's infertility issues. I've tested very young and healthy internally, minus PCOS which is regulated well by drugs. I can understand doing these things if I was the one in the marriage with fertility issues-but I'm not. My Doc is pleased with me and with the quantity and size of eggs I produce. Would these things do me any good? I'd normally say any excuse to have a massage is a good one, but in reality, these things are rather expensive to have done-especially more than once. What's your experience been with these things and implantation?